


(Calling Me As You) Fade To Black

by DGCatAniSiri



Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-26
Updated: 2017-12-26
Packaged: 2019-02-20 14:23:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13148511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DGCatAniSiri/pseuds/DGCatAniSiri
Summary: As the archdemon roars, Alistair makes a decision......and sees that decision taken out of his hands.





	(Calling Me As You) Fade To Black

Fire. Everything was on fire. Even the fire was on fire. 

And it was going to only get worse. 

While running through Fort Drakon, they could imagine the fires weren’t burning Denerim to the ground. The darkspawn had torn through Ferelden’s capitol like it was theirs to destroy. 

No. Alistair knew – he KNEW – they would not have it. He would not allow it. He and the others.

As the archdemon lashed out at them, he looked to Aedan, the man who’d led them through all of this. Who’d won every battle, overcome every obstacle, that it had taken to reach this point. 

The man who’s heart Alistair knew he had broken.

Eamon had been firm – if Alistair was going to be the king of Ferelden, he had to have an heir at some point. Which meant he’d need to have a queen. And that had meant that he had to end his relationship with the other man. He had to. Alistair knew himself. There may be many nobles who considered marriage an act of alliance, but he’d always viewed it as an act of love. If he was going to marry some woman for the sake of an heir, he could not be... entangled with someone else. 

For better or worse, as much as it hurt Aedan, as much as it hurt Alistair – and it did, he truly did love the other man - with the responsibility of king... He’d had to end things between them, though he hadn’t wanted to.

And now, here they were, in the fight for their lives.

The archdemon let out another roar as Aedan’s daggers, Alistair’s sword, Leliana’s arrows, and Wynne’s magic struck at it again. It was only here and now that it really sunk in for Alistair that he’d survived two prior dragon attacks. He supposed he was becoming something of an expert on the subject. Though he really didn’t like the idea of being in a position to routinely use that particular skillset...

As the dragon roared again, Alistair also realized that it was slowing. The dragon was dying. The battle was nearly won.

And, very soon, it would be time for the killing blow. 

He made a decision in that moment – he wouldn’t give Aedan the chance. He would slay the archdemon instead. Best decision for all, really. He wouldn’t be able to be with the man he loved anyway, and he’d be able to be remembered as a king who’d saved his land. Aedan could remember him as a hero, sacrificing himself to let the man he loved live, he’d honor Cailan by slaying the beast with his sword, and he wouldn’t have to become the king. Let Anora rule, she wanted the crown so much. It was an easy decision, all things considered. 

The archdemon at last crumpled, still trying to lash out at its attackers, but even the mindless darkspawn could tell that this fight was almost over. Alistair readied himself to rush at the archdemon, take that fatal blow, let the archdemon’s soul take him, kill him...

And then, before Alistair could move, Aedan let his daggers clatter to the ground. He raced to the archdemon, grabbing one of the swords of the fallen hurlocks surrounding them. And as he ran, he sliced the sword against the dragon’s long neck, showering the ground with a mighty spray of blood. 

“No...” Alistair whispered. It was supposed to be ME.

As Aedan drove the blade home, a great beam of light emerged from the dying dragon. Alistair wanted to run to him, stop him, stand beside him, SOMETHING, but found he couldn’t move – be it magic or simple, primal fear, he couldn’t say, he just knew that he was rooted to the spot. 

And then he was hurled back as an explosion of light burst from the dragon. 

The archdemon was dead.

Alistair pulled himself up, dazed, but recovering. As his vision solidified, he found himself moving – _Oh, now we can move..._ – towards Aedan’s prone form.

“Aedan,” he croaked out, his voice cracking the silence around them. “Aedan, please...”

As he scooped up his lover in his arms, he could hear Aedan’s breathing become ragged. Alistair’s blood turned to ice. He knew that sound, the sound of a dying man gasping for air. He might be alive now, but he wouldn’t be for long. Alistair glanced back to Wynne, desperate for her to cast some miraculous spell to save Aedan. But the pained look on her face said it all.

The cruelest cut of it... Alistair knew exactly why he done it. For the same reason that he had wanted to. 

And yet it was Aedan, dying in his arms.

“Aedan... It should have been me...” Alistair said, his vision filling with tears.

Despite the difficulty he was having breathing, that brought a fond smile to Aedan’s face. “I... thought you might... think that. Its why... I didn’t give you... a choice.” He reached up, a bloody hand cupping Alistair’s face. “Be... the king... they need. I’ll... I’ll be waiting for you... my love.”

“No. Please, please... Don’t go. Aedan... I love you,” Alistair pleaded, begging. He looked at the other man, seeing the pain contort his features. It was hard enough, watching him die. Watching him die in agony... He didn’t deserve it. He didn’t deserve any of this.

Aedan tried to hold his smile, but it turned into a grimace. “I... I lo...” It was a struggle, ragged breaths shaking his body. He was desperately attempting to get the words out, knowing they’d be his last. Alistair wanted to urge him to save his strength... But for what? He was dying. Nothing he could do would stop it. 

He’d slain the archdemon. He’d saved Ferelden. Saved Thedas. He deserved better than this. This shouldn’t be his ending.

Alistair took Aedan’s hand in his own, nodding. “I know. I know.” He repeated it, unsure if Aedan even could hear him at this point. He held tightly to Aedan’s hand, even as he felt it starting to go slack, as the light in Aedan’s eyes began to dim.

_Maker, why? Why did you have to ask this of him? Of us?_

_I don’t know how to live without him._

**Author's Note:**

> Blame Evanescence and the song "My Last Breath" for this, not me. I just chased the plot bunny, that was the inspiration.


End file.
